EAGLE BUTTE, SD — Nationwide, teen dating violence affects nearly 10 percent of all teenagers. For Native American youth, the numbers are even more frightening: A 2014 study found that 36.5 percent of indigenous teens reported involvement in physical dating violence — either as victims, perpetrators or both.
February was Teen Dating Violence Awareness Month. Recognizing the disproportionate impact of dating violence on Native teens, the Cheyenne River Youth Project approached this past month with a programming mix dedicated in equal measure to education and fun.
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“We understand that, far too often, our teens are vulnerable to physical, emotional and sexual abuse as well as stalking behaviors,” said Jerica Widow Jones, CRYP’s programs director. “We know the consequences of this are severe, from anxiety and depression to substance abuse and suicidal ideation.
“We want to do our part to help educate our kids about what healthy relationships look like, how to recognize the warning signs in unhealthy relationships and how to get help,” she continued. “We also know that we need to provide a positive outlet for teens to enjoy socializing with each other, so they know what that looks and feels like. That’s what we set out to accomplish each February.”
On the educational side, Jones and her programs staff arranged for Tayzia Claymore-Knight from the Sacred Heart Outreach Program on the Cheyenne River Sioux Reservation to meet with teens in February. Claymore-Knight is a CRYP alum; she attended youth project programs as a teenager, particularly enjoying the pre-prom Passion for Fashion event.
Her presentation included topics such as self-love, healthy versus unhealthy relationships, and the differences between modern dating and traditional courting. Claymore-Knight also advised the teens to take advantage of the knowledge shared through CRYP programs. She said the life skills she learned through CRYP supported her when she left home to become a college student.
“Tayzia did a great job,” Jones said. “According to the feedback we received, the teens learned 17 different ways they could show themselves love, and they learned how they can find themselves… who they really are. They also shared they didn’t know parents could have unhealthy relationships too. That’s an important part of breaking the cycle of domestic violence in our community.”
The CRYP team also welcomed Lakota elders and cultural educators Manny and Renee Iron Hawk for a special Lakota language presentation for February. The teens learned how to share compliments on Valentine’s day and related words such as Iputaka (to kiss), Wahca (flower), Poskiluza (to hug), Nape Kiciyuza (to hold hands) and Iyotancila (to care for someone).
There was plenty of time for fun as well. On Valentine’s Day, CRYP hostedSkuya (Sweet) Night at the Cokata Wiconi Teen Center from 4 to 7 p.m. Attendees ages 13-18 made the most of open gym time with basketball-related games such as 5-on-5, layup races and “dizzy shots.”
In addition, they enjoyed refreshments, socializing with friends and decorating heart-shaped cookies to give to loved ones. CRYP staff even had a photo booth with backdrops featuring the four directions and the Lakota words for “love” and “heart.”
“It was a great time in a safe space,” Jones said. “The kids put their cell phones away. Instead of scrolling, they talked about their day with each other.”
Then, to end the month, CRYP hosted Midnight Basketball for younger teens on Friday, Feb. 28. Youth ages 13-15 had an opportunity to enjoy a bonfire prior to the doors opening for the popular 9 p.m.-1 a.m. program, which also included board games, movies, food and prizes.
The same night, CRYP hosted Movie Night Madness at “The Main” youth center next door. From 4 to 6 p.m., children ages 4 to 12 enjoyed a movie, popcorn, snacks and hot chocolate with staff and volunteers.
Jones said programs at The Main provide the youth project’s first opportunity to connect with children in the community, and the staff seeks to enforce the idea that CRYP is a positive, safe place to have fun, learn and grow.
“Eventually, they will transition to the teen center, and we want them to already associate CRYP with positive energy, activities, mentors and role models,” she explained. “We want them to understand we will always be here for them, from childhood through young adulthood and beyond.”
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The stakes couldn't be higher. Native languages are being lost at an alarming rate. Food insecurity plagues many tribal communities. But solutions are emerging, and these stories need to be told.